<![CDATA[<br />ZACCHAEUS FINANCIAL COUNSELING, INC.<br /><br />FINANCIAL PLANNING WITH A MISSION - Blog]]>Wed, 18 Oct 2017 13:10:43 -0800Weebly<![CDATA[What does the direction of my life say about my ability to be in control?]]>Wed, 08 Mar 2017 20:03:55 GMThttp://zacchaeusfinancial.org/1/post/2017/03/what-does-the-direction-of-my-life-say-about-my-ability-to-be-in-control.htmlJ.D. Walt commented on George Barna’s research that we have learned to grow churches without really growing people. We can get people into the church, but we can’t get them into Christ.

While there may be many possible reasons, may I suggest that at the heart of this symptom lies a familiar culture that has blurred the line between holiness and sin? Sin isn’t really all that bad, and holiness is easier to achieve than Christ makes it appear.

When we’re trusting in Visa, the stock market and a paycheck, it should be no surprise that we’re worried about sin. Trusting in the culture holds us back from genuinely pleasing God.

What we do with faith determines what we do with money. But what we do with money can seriously undermine our faith. A familiar culture blurs the lines when faith matters most.

Mary DeMuth attributes idolatry to control. If we pray to the rain god and it rains, then we feel we are in control over our environment. Perhaps if we appease the gods with our best food, we will someday be blessed with fortune, and that will make our starvation worthwhile. If I put one more month’s of bills on Visa, surely next month God will do something special.

But control is an illusion when we’re not honoring God. While we think we are controlling our circumstances through charging daily living needs, our lives are headed off the cliff. If I’m really in control of my life, then it shouldn’t be headed in that direction ... or it doesn’t say much about my ability to be in control.]]>
<![CDATA[Why are you following God?]]>Tue, 21 Feb 2017 15:02:59 GMThttp://zacchaeusfinancial.org/1/post/2017/02/why-are-you-following-god.html“Idolatry is always the reason we ever do anything wrong,” wrote Timothy Keller in Counterfeit Gods.

Why do we ever disobey? Isn’t it because we desire something other than what God commands? When one of my children refuses to do homework, it is usually because they would rather be playing. The desire to play beats out the cost of doing homework. But stopping all play does not remedy the problem. The homework must be done.

Keller writes that we can’t simply forsake our idols (whether they be materialism, achievement, lust, the desire to please, food, porn, reputation, or anything else). Instead, we must worship that which is higher. 

Our spiritual lives get off track when we allow something, even if it is small, to create separation between us and God. Then, we go on living, expecting that God will be okay with what we’ve done. We go on attending church, Bible studies, prayer groups, revival services, and missions events as if the tiny mark on the chalk board did not exist.

And then the tiny mark begins to silently grow.

When we explain away our disobedience, our spiritual lives become stagnant, even if we never stop going to church. But Christ finds the lukewarm heart repulsive. Revelation 3:16 We are lukewarm when we are not opposed to Christ but not completely sold out to Him. We don’t want to openly reject Him, but we aren’t going to give Him our all either.

So, why are you following God in 2017? If prayer doesn’t work like it used to, if your faith lacks power, or God seems far away, it could be an indication something is wrong. We can’t really call ourselves followers of Christ when we allow sin to separate us from Him.]]>
<![CDATA[HRAs Make a Combeback]]>Wed, 08 Feb 2017 14:49:51 GMThttp://zacchaeusfinancial.org/1/post/2017/02/hras-make-a-combeback.htmlHRAs Make a Comeback

A couple weeks before Christmas, Congress passed the 21st Century Cures Act. Quietly slipped in at the very end of the Act is a section reuathorizing the Health Reimbursement Arrangement for employers with less than 50 employees.

The Affordable Care Act eliminated this key business planning opportunity and employee benefit for all but the sole proprietor who had no other employees.

The Health Reimbursement Arrangement is an account funded only by the employer for use by the employee. The employee may withdraw the funds for qualified health care related expenses on a tax-free basis. This includes using the funds to pay for health insurance premiums and long-term care insurance premiums.

There are some new rules to keep in mind that did not apply to previous HRAs.

The employer must not already offer a group health plan for its employees. If the employer already offers group health insurance, it cannot also offer an HRA.

The HRA must be made available to all eligible employees. In determining who is an eligible employee, the employer may exclude all employees who have been employed for less than three years.

The employee must provide proof of coverage before funds may be disbursed for the payment or reimbursement of health care expenses.

The employee may withdraw a maximum of $4,950 per year ($10,000 for a family when the HRA covers the employee’s family members). There is some variation allowed in this figure based on the employee’s specific situation. The amount may be adjusted for inflation in future years, and the amount is also prorated when an employee is covered for less than the calendar year.

The employer is also required to provide employees with written notice, and the Act contains recommended language for the notice. Included must be a warning of the potential for the employee to be penalized for not maintaining adequate health insurance coverage, and a recommendation that the employee report the HRA to the Health Care Exchange when determining the amount of the employee’s premium tax credit amount.

Because the ACA eliminated the employer’s ability to offer tax-free assistance with their employees’s health insurance premiums, the new HRA may be just the ticket to help employees meet their health costs.]]>
<![CDATA[What do you want God to do in 2017?]]>Thu, 19 Jan 2017 16:25:11 GMThttp://zacchaeusfinancial.org/1/post/2017/01/what-do-you-want-god-to-do-in-2017.htmlIn the cool summer mountains of southwest Virginia, a medical missionary said to me, “Many people here are living on their credit cards and believe that God will one day show up and rescue them.”

There is no doubt in my mind that God works in the middle of our difficult circumstances. However, I have learned a few things about how God works when He does “show up.”

First, we have to be looking for Him. God promises to reveal Himself and intervene in our circumstances when we are seeking Him. “Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you.” Matthew 7:7 If you are not diligently seeking God, then your expectations will probably leave you disappointed. Mounting credit card debt while waiting on God would be a reliable indication of this deficiency.

Second, our commitment to God must ring true. We cannot bring to God what we think pleases Him and expect multiplied blessings from His hand. God does not owe us for anything we do. Matthew Henry said it well, “Many boast of their obedience to the command of God; but what mean then their indulgence of the flesh, their love of the world, their passion and uncharitableness, and their neglect of holy duties, which witness against them?” 1 Samuel 15:18-23

What do you want God to do in your life in 2017? Are you looking to Him for it? Are you committed to Him above all else?]]>
<![CDATA[Trickle Up or Trickle Down?]]>Thu, 10 Nov 2016 17:19:21 GMThttp://zacchaeusfinancial.org/1/post/2016/11/trickle-up-or-trickle-down.htmlThe basic premise behind the economic stimulus packages put together by the federal government in recent years is that if the masses have money they will spend it. When they spend it, their money trickles up the corporate chain where it can be reinvested back into the economy through to grow businesses and, ultimately, lead to more jobs and increased salaries. At the same time, some tax rates are raised to recapture federal spending through taxation.

Does it work? Let’s take an example. In 2009, I bought a home and received a first time homebuyer credit (stimulus). Initially, that credit was deposited into a savings account. Over time, however, we used that money to replace the windows in our home, making it more energy efficient, and remodeled the kitchen, doing all the fabrication work myself.

Someone had to make the windows and install them. And someone had to make the plywood and materials for our kitchen cabinets and countertop, transport them to the store, and sell them at the local retail level. In theory, the credit we received did trickle up through the economy.

However, most of the goods we purchased (not sure about the windows) were manufactured on foreign soil. So other than profit to the store, the cost of the goods left our country.

Added to that, many global corporations with domestic operations or headquarters have increasingly utilized off shore strategies to shelter income from taxation. So the money trickled up, but some of it left our shores to foreign manufacturers and some of it was sheltered from taxation.

This means a good portion of the funds that trickled up are out of reach of federal taxation (will not replenish funds used in the stimulus) and were not reinvested into the economy, either because they stayed off shore or they were kept was profit.

Trickle up assumes that every dollar the government pumps into the economy will eventually work to expand businesses, jobs and salaries which will eventually replenish government spending through taxation. But when much of the money goes to pay for imports and is sheltered from taxation in off shore entities, trickle up fails to restart the economy or replenish government coffers.

If it created more jobs on domestic soil and kept more of the money on domestic soil, then trickle up economics would probably have been more successful at restarting the stalled economic engine. And it would have created long-term, sustainable growth, after which the government could withdraw its hand and leave the economy to run on its own power. Instead, we are still seeing artificial intervention through, as an example, zero or near zero interest rates at the Federal Reserve.

The design of trickle up economics is to put more money into the hands of the very wealthy and trust that they will reinvest the additional wealth in domestic production. But it only works if the money trickling up stays within our borders and is available for taxation.

Trickle down is equally a government economic stimulus package. The thrust behind trickle down economics is that more money in the hands of the very wealthy will lead to increased investment in domestic production. However, the approach is different.

Trickle down depends on tax cuts and subsidies targeted toward businesses and the very wealthy. To the extent low to middle income families enjoy tax cuts and more discretionary income, we’re back in the same boat as trickle up economics so far as creating jobs on foreign soil unless the goods they purchase are manufactured on domestic soil.

The difference is that trickle down primarily offers benefits to business operations on domestic soil. The plan encourages growth here at home. Expansion of businesses means more production and more jobs of many kinds in various phases of production. More jobs mean higher income among low to middle income families, resulting in – you guessed it – a jump in tax revenue.

In the end, both trickle up and trickle down depend on large businesses and the very wealthy to reinvest stimulus money back into the economy, but they approach it differently. Trickle up puts money in local hands first which eventually works its way to the top, where it is reinvested. Trickle down starts at the top where it is invested and works its way down to the local level. 

All things being equal, trickle down encourages more money to stay on domestic soil. For example, a government stimulus package may award millions of dollars for road construction on domestic soil. This guarantees jobs are created here at home, leading to higher incomes (and more tax revenue) and increased spending (and more tax revenue). The key risk with either approach is whether the businesses receiving the stimulus will actually invest in increased production on domestic soil. Policy can be established to restrict those who will receive stimulus under the trickle down approach to target businesses and very wealthy who will invest in domestic production. This is not possible with trickle up because government cannot control where the money ultimately ends up.

But given all this, the only reason any economic stimulus packages are used in the first place is when either businesses or local people become crippled. These situations represent an economic imbalance, and government decides to intervene to bring things back to the middle. It doesn’t always work and is definitely not fool proof. The better approach is for government not to intervene at all or to exercise restraint when deciding to get involved.]]>
<![CDATA[Does An ABLE Account Fit in Your Financial Plan?]]>Tue, 16 Aug 2016 14:06:13 GMThttp://zacchaeusfinancial.org/1/post/2016/08/does-an-able-account-fit-in-your-financial-plan.htmlIf you are a person with disabilities, or know a person with disabilities, who is dependent on supplemental assistance, saving money just became a whole lot easier.

Traditionally, a person receiving supplemental assistance has been forced to maintain substandard living conditions in order to remain eligible for assistance. However, over the past few years there has been a push to offer greater opportunities for disabled individuals, in particular, to achieve more financial independence. This effort made great strides when the Stephen Beck, Jr. Achieving a Better Life Experience (ABLE) Act was passed into federal law.

The ABLE Act allows persons with disabilities to maintain a savings account and not be penalized through the loss of eligibility for supplemental assistance. These savings accounts are known as ABLE Accounts.

There are five key guidelines for using ABLE Accounts. First, the disability must have had an onset by age 26. That doesn’t mean the ABLE Account must be opened by age 26. A person of any age may open an ABLE Account, but the disability must have had its onset before age 26.

Second, a maximum of $14,000 may be deposited into an ABLE Account annually. This amount may be adjusted for inflation in the future. There is no restriction on who may contribute funds. The disabled person may contribute his or her own funds and family members and friends may contribute into the ABLE Account. For individuals seeking to make gifts but have not for fear of jeopardizing a disabled person’s eligibility for supplemental assistance, an ABLE Account may be a good fit.

Third, a maximum of $100,000 may be saved into an ABLE Account, at which time Social Security Income (SSI) can be lost. It is noteworthy, however, that no other supplemental assistance program will be affected. Once the balance is under $100,000, SSI can resume.

Fourth, funds in the account are to be applied toward qualified disability expenses. This term is rather broad, however, because it is includes housing, medical, transportation, education, job skills, and other expenses which improve quality of life.

Finally, upon the death of the disabled individual, the balance is subject to claims by the state Medicaid administrator. This is true of all individuals receiving Medicaid. When a person receiving Medicaid passes away with assets of any value, a claim can be made in his or her estate to recover funds expended on his or her behalf. ABLE Accounts are not exempt from Medicaid recovery.

The ABLE Account can be a great addition to two other popular programs geared toward assisting people, especially disabled individuals, gain financial independence. Individual Development Accounts are operated by private non-profits and partially funded by the federal government for the purpose of allowing individuals to save without jeopardizing eligibility for supplemental assistance. Savings may be applied toward purchasing a home, starting a small business, or going back to school. The other program, Plan to Achieve Self-Support, is operated by the Social Security Administration to assist disabled individuals secure income from self-employment without jeopardizing eligibility for supplemental assistance.

For those individuals who find success through the Individual Development Account or Plan to Achieve Self-Support, or for those individuals who are already earning an income, the ABLE Account offers a tremendous opportunity to increase financial independence.

Because they can be funded by family members and friends, ABLE Accounts may also play a role in estate and financial planning.]]>
<![CDATA[Difficulties Can Be Opportunities for Growth ... If We Allow It]]>Tue, 28 Jun 2016 12:55:15 GMThttp://zacchaeusfinancial.org/1/post/2016/06/difficulties-can-be-opportunities-for-growth-if-we-allow-it.htmlPeople go through difficult situations all the time. It is a fact of life. When life gets really tough, it can be easy to scream back that God, life or something somewhere is trying to crush us.

Recorded in the Bible are many examples of people enduring difficult situations. If we took out all the accounts in Scripture that dealt with hardship and difficulty, we would essentially have to throw the entire Bible away. If we instead took enough time to digest those accounts, what we would see is that God is at work through each circumstance to accomplish a specific purpose.

Hardship and difficulty are opportunities for growth. They are also times when God wants to accomplish a specific purpose in our lives to benefit us or to work through our lives to benefit others. So, what is our best response? Job 2:9-10 provides us with a starting point, “Then his wife said to him, ‘Do you still hold fast your integrity? Curse God and die!’ But he said to her, ‘You speak as one of the foolish women speaks. Shall we indeed accept good from God and not accept adversity?’ In all this Job did not sin with his lips.”

Although Job could not see what was happening, you and I are given the explanation behind Job’s difficulty. God was allowing hardship to prove Job’s faithfulness – not that God needed to know, but that Job’s faith would grow stronger. At the end of the book of Job, he draws far closer to God than before the first calamity came upon him. There can be no greater outcome of our difficulty than to either grow stronger in our relationship with God or to bring others into a stronger relationship with God.

Job could have easily cursed God. His wife and friends assured Job cursing God would result in a quick death, or a quick escape from hardship. It is this quick escape that we so often desire. Unfortunately, growing stronger in our relationship with God is not something that usually happens quickly.

David in 1 Samuel also had several opportunities at a quick escape from difficulty. After bringing down Goliath, king Saul became jealous of David and wanted to do away with him. What unfolds over many chapters is Saul’s pursuit of David all across the country. However, David twice had an opportunity to put an end to the madness. His first quick escape came while he was hiding in a cave, and Saul entered the same cave for a brief rest. David could easily have taken Saul, and he was tempted to do just that.

Sometime later, David and a close adviser snuck into Saul’s camp at night, and to prove a point, took some of Saul’s possessions while he and the night guards slept. Laying right next to Saul were his weapons, and once again, David could easily have taken Saul, making a quick end to his difficulty.

In all of these instances, however, Job and David both recognized a greater reality beyond quickly ending their difficult situations. There is no future in cursing God or tearing down what God has raised up. For Job, cursing God would have been the end of his integrity and the end of all the good God had brought him to that point. Can we really say a quick escape is worth such a price?

David knew that God had appointed Saul as king, and to cut Saul down was to undermine God. David specifically said he would not attack God’s anointed person, though that person was causing him great difficulty. David acknowledged that if God wanted this to stop God could easily put an end to Saul. That God chose not to do that was part of a decision far weightier than David could reason out.

Throughout David’s difficulty, he came to experience God very closely. David intently listened to God and brought God into every decision. David came to know God so well that he saw how powerful, merciful and just God is. All of these things would come to play a major role in David’s later term as king. In the same way, Job’s friends were convinced of God, and Job himself proved God far beyond how he had experienced God to that point.

When I talk to people about Zacchaeus Financial Counseling, one of their first questions is, “How do you get paid?” There is no question that starting and operating an independent non-profit is not a lucrative deal. In the face of our difficult week last week, it is tempting to abandon the effort, and that would certainly be an easy solution. There are definitely other positions I could take that would be far more profitable.

However, like David and Job, Zacchaeus Financial Counseling is a response to God’s call, and to walk that path, I must take the good with the adversity. For all I know, God wants to accomplish something greater as a result of our difficult week.

Quickly escaping difficult circumstances by doing something like swiping a credit card would be like Job cursing God (and dying) or David taking Saul (and overruling God’s authority). The question you have to answer before swiping the credit card is this, “How can I pay this off?” So you swipe the credit card, then what? Job curses God, and then what? David takes Saul, and then what?

If you don’t have a good answer, then your best decision is to take a little bit more time to consider the plan, the potential long-term consequences, and your options. In all of this, it is vitally important that you bring God into the decision. What does He have to say? What is He doing? What would He like to accomplish? If you took out the credit card, what would it do to His plan?

A really difficult week is an opportunity to experience God in a new way or benefit others. Decisions that have this level of impact cannot be resolved with a quick swipe of the credit card, but if we do swipe the card, our quick escape will bring a quick end to God’s purposes and plan for our lives. Only you can decide if the cost is reasonable.]]>
<![CDATA[Have You Ever Had One of Those Weeks?]]>Tue, 21 Jun 2016 21:26:20 GMThttp://zacchaeusfinancial.org/1/post/2016/06/have-you-ever-had-one-of-those-weeks.htmlHave you ever had one of those weeks? A week when you wish you could play a country song backward, and get your dog back, your truck back, your house back and your wife back. Or maybe you wish you could hit the rewind button on the week.

This past week was one of those for me. It started with a routine repair on our van – the vehicle on which my wife and our entire family rely very heavily. My idea was to do the work myself and save money on the repair by avoiding a mechanic. I had done the same maintenance before and had all the tools I needed. After a day and a half of trying to complete the repair, the van just would not run right. I ended up having the van towed to a mechanic and renting a car for the week.

At the same time, we were working on a project to lay new tile and install a new toilet in the bathroom used by the children. In the process of this job, I broke the flange on which the toilet sits, something which was completely avoidable had I done things a little differently.

A couple nights later, I was moving some things around on the desk with the family’s computer. The sides of the computer were open, and either lightning produced a surge or something on the desk touched the right components on the mother board. There was a flash and pop, followed by silence as the computer shut off.

The straw that broke the camel’s back for the week was when the shoe lace broke while tying my shoes. I can handle a $3.49 pair of shoe laces, but the fact that the lace broke was just piling on more trouble in an already difficult week.

The tow to the mechanic, mechanic’s bill, rental car bill, flange repair and new computer add up to real money – money that for us, like many people, isn’t just laying around waiting to be spent.

When it became apparent that the van repair was not going well, I did a lot of praying. Although it was disappointing that the Lord did not guide my efforts to get the van running correctly, there was a point when I had a very clear sense that He was present with me. Wait, right there, you probably expected me to say I felt hopeless and dejected, like God failed me.

But that’s not what happened. In that moment, the reminder of His presence was more comforting than anything else which could have been offered.

At the very end of an already difficult week, I received the results of the annual oil analysis on our van. The report showed that antifreeze is leaking into the oil. Depending on the problem, this could signal a very expensive repair.

That the Lord knows what is happening and is present throughout the entire situation brings a sense of peace, calm and order to a week that is otherwise spiraling out of control.

Working through Zacchaeus Financial Counseling, I can see that credit cards have become the safety net of choice for many people, including those who identify as Christians. If the Lord is present with us in our circumstances, then why do you need a credit card? Do you not believe He will actually be there for you when there is a problem? Do you not believe His timing is good? Do you not believe His providence will be enough?

In our country’s quest to achieve a culture based on consumption and consumerism, the credit card has become common place to the point that we are desensitized to it. We don’t want to wait for anything or let anything get in the way of making the purchase. When swiping the credit card, our minds have become conditioned to accept it as an easy and socially acceptable way to pay, even perhaps the socially expected way to pay. If you’re not using some type of credit to buy anything and everything, you must be behind the times – this is the message of society.

However, if I used the credit card to solve the problems of my week, where would God fit in my circumstances?

He wouldn’t. And He doesn’t fit into our circumstances when we whip out the credit card, because we don’t allow Him.

Toward the end of the week, I came across this verse at Psalm 142:3a, When my spirit was overwhelmed within me, Thou didst know my path. NASB

This verse on the one hand expressed very well how my week was going – overwhelming! On the other hand, it expresses very well the Lord’s role in how my week was going – He knows where we are and what we are facing. He is present in our circumstances!

Having that knowledge, what is our proper response? What do we do with the Lord? How can we acknowledge how closely the Lord is with us on a daily basis?

David had a really bad week which turned into multiple years of difficulty as recorded in 1 Samuel 18-31. We’ll talk more about that next time and how it applies to our difficult weeks.]]>
<![CDATA[Save, Spend or Invest?]]>Wed, 08 Jun 2016 16:42:26 GMThttp://zacchaeusfinancial.org/1/post/2016/06/save-spend-or-invest.htmlOne of the key roles of the Federal Reserve is to control monetary policy. What exactly this means and how it is done can all seem rather mysterious and beyond comprehension. However, a powerful tool in their bag of tricks is control of interest rates.

Whether we realize it or not, interest rates largely control our decisions to save, spend and invest. When interest rates are high, we tend not to borrow because it is costly. Saving is enticing, however, because we can earn comparatively more on money we leave in the bank. When interest rates are low, borrowing (and spending) is encouraged because it is comparatively inexpensive, and saving is perceived to be more costly given the lack of income from money left in the bank.

However, making money decisions based on Federal Reserve policies can impose more significant consequences than we are led to believe.

Leading up to the 2008 stock market crash, interest rates were falling, and investors were led to buy stock instead of accumulating money in the bank. Holding cash was perceived to be costly, and many investors put all their cash in the stock market. Behind the scenes, the Federal Reserve’s monetary policies were aimed at controlling the stock market for the benefit of a few wealthy investors rather than controlling monetary policy for the whole nation. The resulting stock market crash enabled one of the largest transfers of wealth our nation has ever known.

Rather than hold their positions, the average investor believed it was better to sell – when the market was going down or at the bottom. These sales completed the transfer of wealth. Few investors had cash to capitalize on the struggling market, and the fate of their investment portfolios and retirement accounts was sealed.

Although we’re told cash does not serve any useful purpose in an investment portfolio, this message is rather self-serving in favor of wealthy bankers and stock brokers.

The investors who did well during the market crash had plenty of cash in their portfolios, did not sell all of their positions, and used cash reserves to take advantage of discount prices, riding the wave back up.

Saving serves many useful purposes for the average person, even though it does not currently offer sexy returns. Cash ensures you have the resources to survive fluctuations in your income and address crises and emergencies that arise in your home. Cash enables you to take advantage of opportunities you would otherwise pass up without cash on hand. Cash insulates a portion of an investment portfolio from wild swings in the value of investments.

Urges to borrow and spend should be ignored, especially while interest rates remain enticingly low. When cash is scarce, values of assets rise because available cash is chasing a limited number of assets – think the housing market, again! To borrow during such a time puts you at risk for being underwater when values predictably fall. Then when the loan is foreclosed, whatever cash you invested is lost. This will particularly come true when the Federal Reserve raise interest rates, signaling investors to hold cash. An increase in spending also puts your financial plan on thin ice. Less cash means you have fewer resources to address emergencies.

When you are not insulated against market swings and personal emergencies, you become more at risk for financial disaster. Those in poverty and earning low incomes are more sharply affected during these times because they have fewer resources to address household needs, and losing even a small amount of money on investments and financed purchases can be financially devastating.

While Federal Reserve policies once favored a strong national economy, their more recent policies favor transferring wealth away from the common citizen. Buyer beware!]]>
<![CDATA[What is more important -- achieving a goal or winning your neighbor's approval?]]>Wed, 01 Jun 2016 18:11:42 GMThttp://zacchaeusfinancial.org/1/post/2016/06/what-is-more-important-achieving-a-goal-or-winning-your-neighbors-approval.htmlHow you answer that question depends on which you perceive to be more important. So, have you decided?

In the last post, we considered the case of my son’s being bullied in school and how understanding manipulation techniques of the bullies gives us a starting point to deal with the likes of Edward Bernays, the father of modern consumerism, and his public relations manipulation techniques.

Every household has a set of priorities that demand attention before anything else – shelter, food, clothing, health care, transportation and utilities. Ever since you were a child, you have had some goals in mind for your life – career, education, climb Mount Everest and other accomplishments that give your life meaning and significance. And if you are human, there are a list of things you would like to have which are neither priorities nor goals – beach house, sports car, latest iPad, etc.

It took reorienting my son’s definition of himself to overcome the bullying, and that is our starting point here as well. The definition we have of ourselves controls how we handle manipulative marketing. Two key things help us define ourselves – the way we respond to what happens in life and what we accomplish in life.

First, we need a set of principles and behaviors that will guide how we respond. When _________ happens, I will do ___________. It was not enough for my son to have a definition of himself. He needed a way to respond. When I am bullied, I will turn around and walk away. The definition you hold about yourself will inform your response to situations, and you can respond to situations when you have a firm definition of yourself.

Second, we have an inner need to accomplish something or to feel significant, and we complete achievements by intentional behavior. That’s a fancy way of saying we need goals to help us get things done in life. Not just any goals, our goals must be interesting, achievable and measurable. Goals are what help us get out of bed in the morning and get through difficult times.

So, when society asks the question, “Are you going to be fashionable or are you poor,” you can confidently say, “I am pursuing a worthwhile goal that defines who I am, the thing you want me to buy does not fit into my goals, and achieving my goals will ultimately bring me more satisfaction.”

In other words, we don’t need to fit into society’s definition of a fashionable family to have satisfaction and meaning in life.

However, following these principles involves a system of trade-offs, otherwise known as opportunity cost. When standing in the check-out line, you consider how the candy bar might taste, but then you realize that buying a candy bar every time you visit the grocery store is going to slow down progress on your goal. You have to decide which is more important, and here are some tips that will help.

1. Reduce your exposure to media. Media includes television, smart phones, tablets, news, social media, radio, and internet. Marketing depends specifically on these channels to disseminate their campaigns. The less we are exposed to media, the less we can be manipulated into buying something we don’t need to solve a problem we don’t have. Facebook, as an example, openly admits your news feed is manipulated for the purpose of making a profit and influencing your thinking on current issues. Folks, they wouldn’t do this if it didn’t work, but the trouble is we don’t really detect what is happening in the moment.

Media is addicting and very time consuming. Stepping away from media requires an intentional decision to either limit time on media or carve out specific times each day when media is turned off. From time to time, I will go on a Facebook fast, and, while the task can be hard, the results are amazingly beneficial. I also use Facebook feed apps that greatly reduce the amount of time I need to spend online to keep up with my friends and causes that matter to me.

We have little respect for the amount of media and advertising our minds receive each day and the effect they have on us. Researchers at California State University report that by the time the average child finishes elementary school, he or she is exposed to 8,000 murders on television. By age 18, that number jumps to 200,000. Each year the average child is exposed to 20,000 television commercials. By the time a person is age 65, the total number of commercials they will have seen is 2 million. Nearly all survey participants acknowledge that television commercials make their children materialistic.

This is just television. Imagine how these numbers grow exponentially when you add in newspapers, e-mail, internet, smart phones, tablets, etc. We cannot simply take in all this information and expect it to have no effect or that we can easily counteract it.

Intentionally limiting your intake of media will have positive, healthy effects on your mind, body, relationships and personal finances.

2. Reduce your exposure to shopping, coupon and deal sites. If you are tempted to shop, browsing deals is not going to help. Couponing can be a big help for the family with a tight budget, but it can also create big problems by tempting you to buy. Remember, you save more by not spending than by spending with a coupon.

3. Live by a financial plan. The financial plans I create begin with the client’s needs, goals and desires. The person you want to become and the things you want to experience should be the number one driver of how you spend your time and money. Where we spend our money and time dictates who we will become. A well developed financial plan gives purpose to how we allocate our money and informs how we allocate our time. Time is an important factor here because we use time to spend and earn money.

4. Implement budget controls. Yes, you should have a budget. Whether a budget is important is not the question most people ask. The more pressing question is how to live by a budget. The only answer is to use budget controls. Some examples include an emergency fund, cash envelope system and a healthy reward system for good money behavior and reaching goals.

Public relations, Edward Bernays, marketing campaigns and all media content actively use psychology to manipulate your behavior to spend money or sway your opinion on cultural issues. It takes just as much psychology to respond – the psychology of money, self-control, and achieving goals.

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